Posts

Showing posts from May, 2005
I am half sick of shadows... Another day, another week, another month, another year. I'm having trouble focusing. I need to learn to let go of the pressures of work, of life, of family. I need to quit fearing the next phone call, the next doctor's visit, the next buzzing of the alarm clock. I am here in this moment, I'm alive and doing fairly well, and I need to celebrate that instead of listening to the ticking of the clock, anticipating the next moment. It's a character flaw I need to work on, and I guess today's as good as any to start.
If it makes the lightsaber noise when you fire it up, and the sound of Chewbacca when I shut it down, then I'll HAVE to scrape up the pennies to get one of these :) http://www.alienware.co.uk/starwars_pages/awswaurora.aspx?from=google:starwars
Image
Why am I not surprised? Of course I would be Yoda.... A venerated sage with vast power and knowledge, you gently guide forces around you while serving as a champion of the light. Judge me by my size, do you? And well you should not - for my ally is the Force. And a powerful ally it is. Life greets it, makes it grow. Its energy surrounds us, and binds us. Luminescent beings are we, not this crude matter! You must feel the Force around you, everywhere. Yoda is a is a character in the Star Wars universe. More Yoda information is available at the Star Wars Databank .
There are moments in each of our lives where time seems to stand still and everything suddenly is upside down, off-kilter, as if viewed through a broken kaleidescope. I've had my share of these, and I'm smart enough to know that there will be others. I've discovered that I now belong to a club I didn't want to be a member of, and my mother has become a statistic. Cancer is the elephant in the living room for most of us - a topic that exists but must not be discussed because discussing it, facing it, dealing with it, is too difficult. Ignoring it, no matter how big or how obvious, is somehow easier. So dealing with the information received in a phone call, first from her four days before her surgery, then from some anonymous nurse on the other end of the beige phone in the waiting room, has been harrowing. Cancer no longer equals death, but it is still frightening. And I'm the strong one, the dependable one, the one who must have Vulcan blood in my veins because I d