Ah, the chaotic comfort of fall, the season when my kids are needy, the schedule is impossible, and there's never enough of anything to go around. Miranda's speeding ticket was dismissed, she dropped one of her three English classes, and now wants to go on a spending spree in her spare time with her "spare" money. Stephen is, well, Stephen - watching his bank account dwindle to nothing while he spends entirely too much on fast food... but hey, he's 21 now. Another year or two and he'll declare his independence - and I'm betting I'll still be doing semi-monthly money transfers. Heather either is really enjoying high school and doing well in class, or is the best actress on the planet. I'm not taking any bets. I just want her to pass all her coursework. My gadding butterfly just won't light long enough to take this stuff seriously. Tonight is Open House at school, so maybe I'll get a better idea of what's going on. Tomorrow we have "Call to Freedom" at the church, so I guess Thursday night I'll actually cook for the first time this week. Unless, of course, something else pressing comes up ;)
I've never been good with expressing emotions. I always felt that emotions were a sign of weakness - part of being raised as my father's "son", I suppose. Lately I'm having a hard time bottling up those things that bubble up when people start flinging arrows and stones. Some I deserve. Others, less so. Innocent comments get taken out of context and used to further some cause. I make a genuine post about an overwhelming feeling I have, and someone turns it into an accusation, based on some sort of internet statistic that proves I've posted in response to something else. Frankly, I don't see the connection. I get angry more often than I used to, but I often feel like I've been kicked in the gut too. I'm not accustomed to that one. It usually brings tears. Intended kindnesses are perceived as attempts to control. And this post will be labeled as an attempt to send someone on a guilt trip - but hey - if the shoe fits, baby, wear it out.
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